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Kick It

The morning alarm didn’t ring. I woke up a good 90 minutes after I was supposed to, and I simply didn’t want to go to school. My mother came in and insisted, despite my pleas to stay home.
By the time I got there I had already missed the first two classes, and of course I didn’t do the homework. The teacher just went on and on like some holier than thou preacher at me, in front of the whole
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Swamp Makes You Think

Swamp Thing Painting

I started painting with acrylics recently. I’ve always drawn with pen and pencil mediums but aside from some watercolor in my youth I never painted much. I don’t know much of what I’m doing yet but I really like the textures and colors of a few of my first tries.

This one is inspired by the old Berni Wrightson Swamp Thing from “House of Secrets” #92. I posted this on LinkedIn and a friend of mine mentioned that it reminded … read more

Messing with Scammers on The Phone

SCAMMER: “I am with the IRS and we have suspended your Social Security Number due to traces of fraudulent activity and will be sending the cops to your house unless you give us information to fix this.”
ME: “Oh no…what do I need to do?”
SCAMMER: “Please verify your name and birthday first?”
ME: “Or the cops will come to my house?”
SCAMMER: “Yes, the cops will come to your house.”
ME: “Actually, send them over. I’ll wait on the
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Midnight Movies

Once I saw The Shining at a midnight movie and the crowd was so rowdy and drunk they were cheering for Jack Nicholson. Then I came back for a Star Wars midnight movie and they were cheering for Darth Vader. Then next week for a Woody Allen movie and they cheered for Woody Allen.… read more

Gangsta’s Paradise

Once I hosted a comedy show at Luna’s Cafe in Sacrametno and I introduced every comedian with credits that were actually lyrics from Coolio’s “Gangsta’s Paradise.” stuff like “Our next comic is so crazy, even their momma thinks that their mind is gone!” or “Our next comic walked through the valley of the shadow of death and took a look at their life and realized there’s nothing left!” The only thing is that nobody understood what I was doing and … read more

Great Things In Store for RETROCRUSH

It’s hard to believe that this site has been around for 20 years now. Sorry I have so much of the archives offline at the moment, but we’ll have the best of the last 2 decades restored soon! I had originally made this site using old school HTML and Microsoft Front Page, so removing things like embedded code, bad links, and more were always a nightmare. I’m not the biggest fan of WordPress, but it will make it easier to … read more

Just Finished Red Dead Redemption 2

The original Red Dead Redemption has long been one of the best games I ever played. I thought it was so perfect that I was afraid to play Red Dead Redemption 2, thinking it couldn’t possibly live up to the original Rockstar Games classic. It’s probably one of the most fun, deep, and emotionally great videogames I’ve ever played. Now let’s see what Grand Theft Auto 6 will be like.… read more