Gangsta’s Paradise

Once I hosted a comedy show at Luna’s Cafe in Sacrametno and I introduced every comedian with credits that were actually lyrics from Coolio’s “Gangsta’s Paradise.” stuff like “Our next comic is so crazy, even their momma thinks that their mind is gone!” or “Our next comic walked through the valley of the shadow of death and took a look at their life and realized there’s nothing left!” The only thing is that nobody understood what I was doing and … read more

Great Things In Store for RETROCRUSH

It’s hard to believe that this site has been around for 20 years now. Sorry I have so much of the archives offline at the moment, but we’ll have the best of the last 2 decades restored soon! I had originally made this site using old school HTML and Microsoft Front Page, so removing things like embedded code, bad links, and more were always a nightmare. I’m not the biggest fan of WordPress, but it will make it easier to … read more

SUPERMAN’S WEIRD CHAIN FETISH

The image of Superman breaking chains is an iconic and classic way to show off his amazing strength, but the question remains, why does he let people put chains on him in the first place? It’s such a weird kink fetish. My friend, comedian Jessica Roberts, reminds me that he probably does it so the bad guy will do his inevitable speech and Superman will learn his plans. I think he’s just really into bondage, to be honest.

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Sacramento Area Comedy Open Mics

Here’s a list of the open mics in Sacramento and the surrounding area. Enjoy! Try out stand-up comedy today!

Monday: The Scoreboard in Citrus Heights (7691 Auburn Blvd- signups 730, 8PM show- hosted by Matt Medina)
Monday: The Lab in Chico (250 Cohasset Rd , Chico, 8PM hosted by Jesse Mitchell)
Tuesday: Sacramento Comedy Spot (1050 20th St, sign-up 730, 8PM show – priority to comics with guests- list fills instantly) PROOF of VACCINATION REQUIRED
Tuesday: The Canyon
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Just Finished Red Dead Redemption 2

The original Red Dead Redemption has long been one of the best games I ever played. I thought it was so perfect that I was afraid to play Red Dead Redemption 2, thinking it couldn’t possibly live up to the original Rockstar Games classic. It’s probably one of the most fun, deep, and emotionally great videogames I’ve ever played. Now let’s see what Grand Theft Auto 6 will be like.… read more

DESTROYING A DOG!

Hahah…I picked this Mars Attacks! figure up at World’s Best Comics in Sacramento today, and it’s wonderful. The original ’60s Topps cards were amazingly lurid and one of them featured a horrible Martian blasting a dog with his ray gun wtih the card title “Destroying A Dog.” This figure by ReAction even includes the ill-fated dog as an accessory. You can check out so many more cool figures by ReAction right here.… read more

Captain America Pretends to be Sick and Steals Cars

One of the weirdly charming and bizarre parts of the forgotten 1990 Captain America film is when he pretends to be carsick to steal a car. It’s a weird enough scene to see once, but as you’ll see in the video clip below, he actually pulls this stunt TWICE! Who wants to see Cap throw his shield and do cool stunts when you can enjoy him faking nausea and carjacking innocent citizens?

I was working in San Francisco in the … read more

The Rob Zombie retroCRUSH Interview

Here’s a fun interview I did with Rob Zombie back in 2011. He was doing a practice show at now long gone theater in Modesto called The Fat Cat. What a thrill it was to interview him in his trailer before the concert. Rob is one of the cooler guys I ever met. He emailed me out of nowhere years back to thank me for the review I gave his masterpiece The Devil’s Rejects. We corresponded off and on and … read more

The Christmas Camera


It was Christmas 2006 and my dad wanted an expensive digital camera as a present. He had enough money saved up for it, but I was in charge of his finances because he has Alzheimer’s Disease, and he was unable to control his own money. I had told him that since he didn’t have a computer and he was prone to losing things, it wasn’t a smart purchase, but he could use an older camera of mine any time he … read more